Do new Arsenal signings depend on Champions League qualification?

The club may protest, but I don't think there are too many of us Gooners who believe that there is a huge war chest of tens of millions of pounds for Arsene Wenger to strengthen his squad.

Or maybe there is, but the cautious Arsenal board is keeping hold of the purse strings until they know that the Gunners have definitely, 100%, surefire guaranteed their place in the group stages of a competition where the prize money could reach £20 million-plus if we make it to the latter stages.

And the Arsenal hierarchy know that's way more than we've every spent on a player.

Call me a cynic, but let's see if Le Boss suddenly goes on a spending spree over the next few days - provided we can deal with Shteve McClarensh Eff Shee Twente thish eveningsh.

Put the Dutch to the sword and hey presto, Danny Fiszman and Peter Hill-Wood might just give Arsene Wenger the combination to the Arsenal safe wherein lies the golden cheque book, which was issued in the last century, but still has a good few pages left in it.

From the bean counters' point of view, Le Boss has surely done his bit for the summer. Sure, he's given Emmanuel Adebayor a hefty pay rise, but look at all the players he's shipped out to reduce that wage bill - Mathieu Flamini, Alexander Hleb, Gilberto and Jens Lehmann can't have been cheap, while Justin Hoyte will have shaved a bit more off the salaries total.

Just to really earn his performance related bonuses, Wenger has also loaned out a crop of youngsters including Philippe Senderos, Armand Traore, Havard Nordtveit and Nacer Barazite - with more to come, no doubt.

So cheer up my fellow Addicts, come 10pm this evening, the moths could be escaping from the Arsenal wallet and Le Professor could be set free to splash, ooh, two or three million quid on some unknown bloke from Zanzibar. And then all our problems will be sorted.